One of the reasons that I've always lived in Greensboro (born and raised, baby...) is that my parents had a court-mediated custody battle when I was a kid. One parent wanted to move out of town with my sibs and me, and the other thought that was a bad idea. I guess I don't have to tell you the outcome.
Now, I happen to have straight parents (as far as I know). Let's imagine instead that I had two mommies. So mommy #1 actually gives birth to me, making her the legal guardian. Mommy #2 agrees to this arrangement because she loves mommy #1 and is sure they'll be together forever (just like my straight parents thought). Also, mommy #2 has no choice - by state law, only one person per gender can be a legal guardian for a child.
But, like my real parents, my two mommies find themselves with irreconcilable differences and split. Mommy #1, aka legal guardian, decides for whatever reason - because she wants to move on or because she wants to move out of town or because she can't stand seeing her ex even to hand off the kid - that mommy #2 shouldn't be a part of the kid's life. Guess what mommy #2 can do about that?
You got it: nothing.
Sad as it is, I have a friend in that very situation. Last time I saw her, she told me the exact amount of time until her child turned 18 and was free to see mommy #2 if she wants to. It's over a decade.
Salon.com addressed this same issue today though in an adoptive setting - it's the exact same scenario except without the turkey baster. One brave woman took her custody battle to the Kentucky Supreme Court where she was, predictably, ruled against. She had nine years until her kid is 18.
This is the side of the gay marriage debate that is all too often left unaddressed. Legal marriage = protected kids.
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